Short Answer: Sleep with a garlic necklace and a wooden stake by my side! 🧛♂️🧄🍆
Explanation: As a fan of Dracula, I would take my obsession to the next level by ensuring I'm fully prepared for any potential encounters with vampires. Sleeping with a garlic necklace around my neck would keep those bloodsuckers at bay, and having a trusty wooden stake nearby would serve as my ultimate defense. Who needs a good night's sleep when you can be a vampire slayer, right?! 😄🌙
Khatib (Guest) on February 24, 2018
😆 This one really got me!
Monica Lissu (Guest) on February 23, 2018
I’d agree with you but then we’d both be wrong. 🤷♂️😆
Baridi (Guest) on January 20, 2018
I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by. ⏳🏃♂️
Anna Kibwana (Guest) on January 17, 2018
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. 🪂🤣
Ahmed (Guest) on January 16, 2018
🤣 This joke is too good!
Mwajabu (Guest) on January 12, 2018
I told myself I should stop drinking, but I’m not about to listen to a drunk who talks to himself. 🍺😂
Patrick Mutua (Guest) on December 17, 2017
Why was Cinderella so bad at soccer? She kept running away from the ball! 👠⚽
Tambwe (Guest) on December 14, 2017
I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I’m doing. 🏃♂️😴
Raha (Guest) on December 11, 2017
I’m on a 24-hour coffee break. ☕⏳
Mariam (Guest) on December 6, 2017
I thought growing old would take longer. 😄👵
Mjaka (Guest) on December 4, 2017
Why don’t lobsters ever share? They’re too shellfish! 🦞🙅♂️
Mwajuma (Guest) on November 25, 2017
Why don’t we tell secrets in a cornfield? Too many ears! 🌽👂
Khalifa (Guest) on November 21, 2017
At my age, I need glasses... just to find my glasses. 👓😜
Mazrui (Guest) on November 17, 2017
Why don’t crabs give to charity? Because they’re shellfish! 🦀💰
Frank Macha (Guest) on November 13, 2017
🤣 Didn’t see it coming!
Victor Kimario (Guest) on November 12, 2017
What’s the hardest part about skydiving? The ground! 🪂🌍
John Lissu (Guest) on November 8, 2017
What did the grape do when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine! 🍇🍷
Josephine Nduta (Guest) on November 2, 2017
This joke deserves an award! 🏆
Amani (Guest) on November 1, 2017
🤣 Didn’t see that coming!
Mjaka (Guest) on October 22, 2017
I’m still laughing, that was too good! 🤣
Abubakari (Guest) on October 9, 2017
I'm not short. I'm just concentrated awesome! 👌😂
Irene Akoth (Guest) on October 2, 2017
Whoever said laughter is the best medicine clearly hasn’t tried chocolate. 🍫😂
Charles Mboje (Guest) on September 20, 2017
I don't trip over things; I do random gravity checks. 🌍😅
Mwagonda (Guest) on September 19, 2017
Some people wake up looking fabulous. I wake up looking for my phone. 📱😴
Zakaria (Guest) on September 12, 2017
I’m multitasking: I can listen, ignore, and forget all at the same time. 🎧🤔
Linda Karimi (Guest) on September 8, 2017
🤣 Pure genius!
Faith Kariuki (Guest) on September 7, 2017
I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done. 📚✍️
Nasra (Guest) on August 27, 2017
What kind of car does a sheep drive? A lamborghini! 🐑🚗
Mzee (Guest) on August 27, 2017
I don’t need to be perfect. I need to be caffeinated. ☕😆
Hassan (Guest) on August 25, 2017
You never realize how boring your life is until someone asks what you do for fun. 🎮🤔
Andrew Mchome (Guest) on August 24, 2017
I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done. 📚😆
Samson Mahiga (Guest) on August 22, 2017
I wasn’t born to 'just get things done'—I was born to confuse people with my nonsense. 🤯🤪
Shukuru (Guest) on August 17, 2017
Chocolate is the answer. Who cares what the question is? 🍫❓
Lydia Mutheu (Guest) on August 10, 2017
😅 I’m still chuckling at this!
Hassan (Guest) on August 5, 2017
What kind of haircuts do bees get? Buzz cuts! 🐝✂️
Grace Mligo (Guest) on June 28, 2017
When nothing goes right, go left. ⬅️💡
Mustafa (Guest) on June 27, 2017
😁 This made my day!
Nassor (Guest) on June 19, 2017
Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose! 🐄🦶
Ann Wambui (Guest) on June 17, 2017
Running late is my cardio. 🕒🏃♀️
Shamsa (Guest) on June 15, 2017
Why does cooking take six hours, but eating takes like three seconds? ⏲️🍽️
Victor Kimario (Guest) on June 12, 2017
I can’t believe I forgot to go to the gym today. That’s seven years in a row now. 🏋️♂️😆
Sarah Mbise (Guest) on June 12, 2017
How do you organize a space party? You planet! 🌌🪐
Agnes Njeri (Guest) on June 10, 2017
I wonder how many calories I burn by jumping to conclusions. 🤔🤸♂️
Margaret Anyango (Guest) on June 9, 2017
Why don’t sharks eat clowns? Because they taste funny! 🦈🤡
Salma (Guest) on June 8, 2017
I’ve started using my kids as weights. That counts as working out, right? 🏋️♂️👶
Lydia Mzindakaya (Guest) on June 2, 2017
Money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy pizza, which is kind of the same thing. 🍕💸
Michael Mboya (Guest) on June 2, 2017
Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two-tired! 🚲😅
Benjamin Kibicho (Guest) on May 31, 2017
My phone battery lasts longer than most people at work. 📱💼
Elijah Mutua (Guest) on May 22, 2017
😃 Instant mood boost!
David Chacha (Guest) on April 23, 2017
I like long walks, especially when they’re taken by people who annoy me. 🚶♂️😜
Robert Okello (Guest) on April 15, 2017
What’s a frog’s favorite candy? Lollihops! 🐸🍭
Hellen Nduta (Guest) on April 12, 2017
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies! 🧹🎉
Joseph Kawawa (Guest) on April 6, 2017
😆 Bookmarking this!
Rose Mwinuka (Guest) on March 24, 2017
If you can’t handle me at my worst, just wait. It gets worse. 😂🤯
Elizabeth Mrema (Guest) on March 6, 2017
Exercise? I thought you said 'extra fries'! 🍟😂
Furaha (Guest) on March 5, 2017
What’s a witch’s favorite subject in school? Spelling! 🧙♀️📖
John Lissu (Guest) on March 3, 2017
Why did the banana go to the doctor? It wasn’t peeling well! 🍌🤒
Daniel Obura (Guest) on March 2, 2017
If at first, you don’t succeed, try doing it the way your mom told you in the beginning. 👩👧🤷♂️
James Kimani (Guest) on February 28, 2017
I hate when I’m singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong. 🎤🤷♀️
Philip Nyaga (Guest) on February 14, 2017
I spend my whole day thinking about food and then I wonder why I’m gaining weight. 🍕😅