πŸ‘‰ Pls dont laugh alone send to ur gud naughty friends….βœ…

A man 4gets to zip up his trousers , so a lady tells him politely, sir ur garage is open. The man gave her a naughty smile as he zips up and asks, Did u see my BLACK RANGE ROVER SPORT parked inside? . The lady smiles back and says no just one small Toyota vitz with two Flat tyresβ€š --Pls dont laugh alone send to ur gud naughty friends….

🐼 Other interesting posts;-πŸ™‰

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πŸ“° Recommended PostsπŸ‘‡

πŸ“Œ A letter from an aborted child

A LETTER FROM AN ABORTED CHILD
Dear Mum,
I have decided to talk to you to let you know my
feelings. I want to know why you did it. My story
is short. I stayed inside you for only a couple of
weeks. I was very comfortable and warm. I felt
really protected. I knew you were a special
person because you never stopped me from
eating the food you ate. I longed for the day I
would see your face. Nine months was a long
time to wait, but I was determined to wait. I had
to be patient.
A man then offered you some amount of money to
get rid of me. I was happy and prayed that this
meant that I would at least see you, the only
person that I knew in the world. I was wrong. I had
almost forgotten the issues until I felt something
sharp pierce my tiny ear. I jerked silently and in
pain, and asked you to protect me. Seconds later
the object came,fiercer than before. My tiny body
was cut up, starting from the ears then arms and
legs. It was an agonizing experience. My head was
then cut off and I died.
It took me a whole hour to die. A whole hour for
an innocent few weeks human being to be
murdered by you! I remember the whole incident
vividly and I keep asking myself what I did to
deserve that cruel death. Why me? Why did you
do that to me? And why was I not given a
chance to live just like they children you hear
playing around? How do you feel when you send
some of them on errands when I could have done
that with pride if you had given me the chance to
live? Don't you see the beauty in playing with a
child that calls you mom with a sweet soft voice?
I know you are having a lot of nightmares. You
remain guilty for the beastly act. Please explain
to God why you committed the heinous act. He
sent me to you as a very special gift. My purpose
was to make you proud by being the great
person God meant me to be. I have forgiven you
though I never lived to see your face. My journey
back to my creator was safe, and I arrived
safely. I was given a red-carpet welcome by an
angel. I am in fact without bitterness. I still love
you, mum.
Yours Never-seen child.
If you are touched, join the "STOP ABORTION"
campaign by sharing this post with your friends.
…. STOP ABORTION !!!…..continuing....

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πŸ“Œ Which kind of witchcraft should I use?

People smoke and drink for a few days and get addicted to it…..continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰Which kind of witchcraft should I use?βœ”

πŸ“Œ Mathematicians view of life

Mathematicians say LIFE is like a line segment drawn from point B to point D…..continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰Mathematicians view of lifeβœ”

πŸ“Œ Thanking God

πŸ‘πŸ‘THANKING GOD πŸ“–….continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰Thanking Godβœ”

πŸ“Œ To learn how to love yourself

Accept Your Personality Your life has not ended yet. You still have plenty of years to live. Hence, it's never too late to improve or develop yourself throughout your life. However, it is best if you accept yourself for whom you are. Be happy and celebrate your unique qualities and characteristics. After all, you are a unique individual created from God's own hands. Be Happy With Your Body Size Both men and women are often too conscious about their physical appearance, especially when they see a well-toned and figured person crossing their way. In case of women, some feel that their breasts are just too small, while there are others who feel they have heavy butt. Men, on the other hand, feel inferior to those who are well built or have a great muscular body. For all such gentlemen and ladies, remember that we are not produced from a single factory. Each one of us is different; hence, it is better if you accept, or rather love, your physical appearance. Built Confidence No person is born with natural confidence. It is the upbringing and your surroundings that help you develop poise and self-confidence. Children who are taught to become self independent from an early age have greater level of confidence than those who look up to their parents for every knick and knack. Start revealing a positive attitude and a feeling of self assurance and see how confidence comes natural to you in no time. Find Out Your Good Qualities And Achievements Looking out for some good qualities in yourself? Were you not able to find any? Does that make you hate yourself further? Why? Aren't you a homosapien? Just like every person has some negative attributes, so does he have positive characteristics as well. It is good to criticize your self but then do not be over critical. Accept your flaws and try to come over them. As for your positives, just keep on bettering them and who knows you might be able to love yourself all the more. Stop Regretting On Your Mistakes So, you have committed a mistake? So what? It's just a mistake. No one is going to beat or punish you to death. Making mistakes is natural to any human being. So stop beating or cursing yourself over and over again. Instead, sit down and analyze your mistakes. Take positive lessons from them and find out what different you can do next time to avoid these stupid and silly errors. Forget the past and plan the future. Don't Let Others Dominate You Sad but true, often people treat you like a doormat simply because you allow them to do so. It's your life and no one has the right to control or rule it, except you. So stop being too kind and generous when a friend constantly borrows money from you with no promises of repaying it back. Stand up and dump that guy who calls and looks up to you only for sex and nothing else. Remember, do not let anyone treat you badly because you deserve better than being only used or criticized…..continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰To learn how to love yourselfβœ”

πŸ“Œ Stages in the development of a business career

Scanning for opportunities, idea generation, and innovation/creativity…..continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰Stages in the development of a business careerβœ”

πŸ“Œ 75 Biblical reasons why you should not drink alcohol

1) Genesis 9:20-26 - Noah became drunk; the result was immorality and family trouble…..continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰75 Biblical reasons why you should not drink alcoholβœ”

πŸ“Œ Just think about this

*No matter how many times the teeth bite the tongue, they still stay together in one mouth. That's the spirit of FORGIVENESS. Even though the eyes don't see each other, they see things together, blink simultaneously and cry together. That's UNITY." May the Lord grant us all the spirit of forgiveness and togetherness*…..continuing....

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πŸ“Œ Story of Peter and his Girlfriend Mercy

*Peter and his girlfriend Mercy were walking during the night..*….continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰Story of Peter and his Girlfriend Mercyβœ”

πŸ“Œ How to make people think in your way

Show respect for the others persons opinions. Never tell a man he is wrong. The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it. If you are wrong admit it quickly and emphatically. Begin in a friendly way. Get the other person saying Yes, yes immediately. Let the other person do a great deal of the talking. Let the other person feel that the idea is his. Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view. Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires. Appeal to nobler motives. Dramatize your ideas. Throw down a challenge….continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰How to make people think in your wayβœ”

πŸ“Œ Avoid a bad Marriage

AVOIDING A BAD MARRIAGE.
By Pastor Chris Oyakhilome PhD…..continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰Avoid a bad Marriageβœ”

πŸ“Œ What our children and today's generation needs to know

When the ancient Chinese decided to live in peace, they made the great wall of China, They thought no one can climb it due to its height. During the first 100 year of its existence, the Chinese were invaded thrice … and every time, the enemy had no need of penetrating or climbing over the wall… because each time they bribed the guards and came through the doors…..continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰What our children and today's generation needs to knowβœ”

πŸ“Œ Just a notice to you

‘``1. πŸ‘‰No matter how beautiful and handsome you’re just remember Baboon and Gorillas also attract tourists .
✌Stop Boasting✌….continuing....

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πŸ“° Recent PostsπŸ‘‡

A Ways. To increase concentration

Pick a valid subject of concentration. If there is no passion or plausible motivation, then your task of concentrating is going to be one hell of a challenge! Remember how you used to do the laundry or mow the lawn so half heartedly and the outcome was a disaster? Analogously, you cannot ace your mathematics test if you resent it and hence if you fail to concentrate, you will also fail the test! The Five More Rule is a technique that has certainly helped many individuals who invariably fall short of concentration. You set a target to finish a fixed amount of work or studying. However, ten minutes later, you are already tempted to step out for a smoke or check the football game score. Block all lures and enticements to immerse your heart and mind into achieving your goals. Solve five more math problems or dedicate five more minutes to a chapter of history, or else face guilt when you indulge in play. To your delight, five minutes is all it takes to engross you to such an extent that you forfeit your break! Stretch your attention span and build mental endurance! If you are convinced you have the world's lowest attention span, here's an interesting exercise. Walk into a movie theater and catch up on a random gripping action or drama film. Thirty minutes into the movie, shift your gaze from the screen and look around. What do you see? Probably a hundred riveted faces. If you stare long enough, you will notice how rarely they blink. Only a false alarm of a fire breakout could distract them! Observe the audiences and learn the art of concentration as they stay still scene after scene. To encourage your strong desire to maintain concentration, eliminate stumbling blocks such as multi-tasking, blaring radios or TV sets and flashing multi-colored lights…..continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰Ways. To increase concentrationβœ”

A Who is the Catholic Church

Before 1517, every Christian was Catholic. As such, today we know that:
If you are Lutheran then your Church was founded by Fr Martin Luther in Germany in 1517.
If you are Menonite, your Church was founded by Grebel, Mantz and Blaurock, in 1525…..continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰Who is the Catholic Churchβœ”

A Interesting story for new year

Ezra and Thomas joined a company together a few months after their graduation from university.

After a few years of work, their Manager promoted Ezra to a position of Senior Sales Manager, but Thomas remained in his entry level Junior Sales Officer position.

Thomas developed a sense of jealousy and disgruntlement, but continued working anyway.

One day Thomas felt that he could not work with Ezra anymore.

He wrote his resignation letter, but before he submitted it to the Manager, he complained that Management did not value hard working staff, but only promoted only the favoured!

The Manager knew that Ezra worked very hard for the years he had spent at the company; even harder than Thomas and therefore he deserved the promotion.

So in order to help Thomas to realize this, the Manager gave Thomas a task.

β€œGo and find out if anyone is selling water melons in town?”

Thomas returned and said, "yes there is someone!"

The Manager asked, "how much per kg?"

Thomas drove back to town to ask and then returned to inform the Manager; "they are 13.50 per kg!"

The Manager told Thomas,

"I will give Ezra the same task that I gave you. Please pay close attention to his response!"

So the Manager said to Ezra, in the presence of Thomas;

β€œGo and find out if anyone is selling water melons in town?”

Ezra went to find out and on his return he said:

"Manager, there is only one person selling water melons in the whole town.

The cost is 49.00 each water melon and 32.50 for a half melon.

He sells them at 13.50 per kg when sliced. He has in his stock 93 melons, each one weighing about 7kg.

He has a farm and can supply us with melons for the next 4 months at a rate of 102 melons per day at 27.00 per melon; this includes delivery.

The melons appear fresh and red with good quality, and they taste better than the ones we sold last year.

He has his own slicing machine and is willing to slice for us free of charge.

We need to strike a deal with him before 10am tomorrow and we will be sure of beating last year's profits in melons by 223 000.00.

This will contribute positively to our overall performance as it will add a minimum of 3.78% to our current overall sales target.

I have put this information down in writing and is available on spreadsheet.
Please let me know if you need it as I can send it to you in fifteen minutes."

Thomas was very impressed and realized the difference between himself and Ezra.
He decided not to resign but to learn from Ezra…..continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰Interesting story for new yearβœ”

A Take this lesson for a poor young man

A very poor newly wedded, young couple lived in a small farm. One day the husband made the following proposal to his wife:
Honey, I will leave the house: I will travel faraway, get a job and work hard in order to come back and give you the comfortable life that you deserve. I do not know how long I will stay away, I only ask one thing, please wait for me, and while I am away, you should be faithful to me, because I will be faithful to you. His wife agreed, so the young man left. He walked many days until he found a farmer who was in need of someone to help him. The young man offered his services. He was accepted. Therefore he discussed the terms with his boss:
Let me work for as long as I want and when I think I should go home, please relieve me of my duties. I do not want to receive my salary. I ask you to save it for me, until the day I leave. The day I decide to go, please give me the money and I will go my way. They agreed on that. So, the young man worked for twenty years without holiday and without rest. After twenty years, he came to his boss and said:
Boss, I want my money, because I am returning to my home. The boss replied:
All right, after all, I made a deal with you and I will stick to it. However, before you go I want to offer you something new: I will give you all your money and send you away; or I will give you 3 pieces of advice and send you away. If I give you money, you lose the 3 pieces of advice. If I give you the 3 pieces of advice, you lose the money. Now, go to your room and think about your answer. He thought for two days. Then he went to the boss and told him:
I want the 3 pieces of advice. The boss stressed again, if I give you the 3 pieces of advice, I will not give you the money, and the man replied:
I want the 3 pieces of advice. The boss then told him:
No. 1: Never take shortcuts in your life, shorter and unknown paths can cost your life. No. 2: Never be too curious, for curiosity towards evil can be deadly. No. 3: Never make decisions in moments of anger or pain, because when you repent, it could be too late. After giving these 3 pieces of advice, the boss said to him:
Here, you have 3 loaves of bread, 2 are for you to eat during the journey and the last is for you to eat with your wife when you get home. So, the man went his way, after twenty years away from home and from his wife, whom he loved so much. After the first day of travel, he found a man who greeted him and asked:
Where are you going? He replied:
To a distant place which is about 20 days away if I continue walking. The man said to him:
Ol' boy, this path is too long! I know a shortcut that is very safe and you will arrive in 5 days only. The man began to follow the path suggested until he remembered the first piece of advice. Then, he returned and followed the long path. Days later he learned that the shortcut led to an ambush.
After a few more days of travel, he found an inn by the roadside, where he could rest. He paid for a room and after taking a bath he lay down to sleep. During the night he woke up as he heard a terrifying scream. He rose to his feet and went to the door to check what happened. As he was opening the door, he remembered the second piece of advice. Therefore he returned, lay down again and slept. At dawn, after breakfast, the owner of the lodging asked him if he had not heard the scream at night. He affirmed that he heard. Then, the host said:
Were you not curious to see what happened? And he replied:
No, I was not. Then the host said:
You are the first guest to leave this inn alive. My neighbour is completely crazy. He usually shouts at night to call someone’s attention. When some of the guests come out, he kills them and buries their bodies in the backyard. The man continued his long journey, eager to arrive soon.
After many days and nights walking, he was very tired, but he finally saw his house far away. It was night. He saw some light coming out of the window of his house and was able to see the silhouette of his wife. But he also saw that she was not alone. He came closer and saw there was a man with her. She softly caressed his hair. When he saw that scene, his heart was filled with hatred and bitterness. He decided to rush at and kill them both mercilessly. However, he took a deep breath and he remembered the third piece of advice. Then he stopped, reflected and decided to sleep outside that night. He slept in the midst of the bushes, determined to make a decision the next day. At dawn, he was calmer and thought:
I will not kill my wife and her lover. I am going back to my boss to ask him to take me back. But before I go, I want to tell my wife that I have always been faithful to her.
He went to the front door and knocked. When his wife opened the door and recognized him, she cried and embraced him warmly. He tried to push her away, but he
was not able. Then, with tears in his eyes he told her:
I was faithful to you but you betrayed me.
She was shocked, so she replied:
How did I betray you? I have never betrayed you. I waited patiently for you for twenty good years. Then he asked:
How about the man that you were caressing yesterday? And she said:
That man is your son. When you left, I discovered I was pregnant. Today he is twenty years old. Hearing that, the man asked her forgiveness. He met and hugged his son. Then he told them all the things he had experienced while away. Meanwhile, his wife prepared some coffee for them to eat together, the last bread given by his boss. After a prayer of thanksgiving, he broke the bread. When he looked at it, he found all his money inside. In fact, there was even more than the right payment for his twenty years of dedication and hard work.
Friends, our God is like this boss. When he asks us to make a sacrifice, he wants to give us more than what we give Him. He wants us to have His unique wisdom as well as the material blessings…..continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰Take this lesson for a poor young manβœ”

A How to develop ones Enterprising Tendencies?

At some point in an entrepreneurial career a person has to start developing experience and learning actively about what they do best and what they should learn to do better, and the sooner they start learning actively the sooner they start being enterprising…..continuing....

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A Tips to keep yourself healthier

Drinking hot lemon water can prevent cancer. Don't add sugar. Hot lemon water is more beneficial than cold lemon water…..continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰Tips to keep yourself healthierβœ”

A 75 Biblical reasons why you should not drink alcohol

1) Genesis 9:20-26 - Noah became drunk; the result was immorality and family trouble…..continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰75 Biblical reasons why you should not drink alcoholβœ”

A Try this if you think you speak English fluently

try dis!
''THREE WITCHES WISH THREE WISHES,BUT WHICH WITCH KNOWS WHICH WISH WHICH WITCH WISHED."
Send it back as a voicenote, let's hear accents,
Don't spoil d fun….
Waiting 4 ur voicenote πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€….continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰Try this if you think you speak English fluentlyβœ”

A Tips of being yourself

Who Are You? There's no possible way you can be yourself without knowing who you really are. You pretend to idolize football player David Beckham because your neighbor does and you want to gain his approval. Soon enough you will realize that you don't know what interests you because you've been whiling away time with what least interests you. Understand yourself, figure out where your deepest passion lies and be proud of your qualities. Contemplate your life and the choices you've made. Take personality tests and you will eventually disentangle the buried mesh of what had been your true interests and hobbies all along! Accept it with pride! Forget The World! So what if the person besides you passed a nasty comment on your outfit. As long as you're comfortable, does it really make a difference to your welfare? Or do you hesitate to raise your hand in class to ask the question that's persistently been pestering you simply because you fear your classmates might find it silly and doubt your intelligence. Why is their opinion even worth it? You should feel stupid for putting their opinions before your clarity on the subject! Forget the world, live your life and be yourself. Happiness will be right behind you! Breathe & Be Honest Why do you want to live through the rest of your life safeguarding your sticky web of lies? Life is never rosy for anybody. Maybe at the beginning, you might not be as fortunate as certain other coveted beings. Nevertheless, if you hold your breath and take each day as it comes, life's delicate balance will soon manifest itself. There is no good reason to be ashamed of who you are. Whether it's a physical or mental shortcoming, the most trusted way to overcoming it is by acknowledging it with courage. We are all blighted with flaws and by hiding them, we are only adding to that list! Express Your Individuality The moment self-confidence is on your side, a beautiful and unique personality will blossom! Standing out isn't easy but it usually comes from within. It might be a skill, or a manner of speaking or infectious charisma. Build up on a character that singles you out from everybody in your planet. Be yourself. Even oddly colored slippers might accentuate your eccentric character after which you might garner admiration from different sides. Don't be a prototype, be a proud unique individual. Believe In Yourself Take off that hideous mask and unleash the beauty hidden underneath its eternal ugliness! If you try to be what you're not, you're going to be unhappy through the remainder of your fake life. Thrive on solitude, engage in soul searching and you will soon be well acquainted with your new best friend- The Real You. Life will soon turn into a elongated party interspersed with memorable episodes of sadness, joy, laughter, bitterness and all the emotions experienced in the life that is worth living!….continuing....

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A Look how words you use may change your life

A story is told about a young Thomas Edison who came home one day with a paper for his mother…..continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰Look how words you use may change your lifeβœ”

A What is a Business Plan?

A business plan is a blueprint of your business. It is a detailed plan from which all other plans should be developed…..continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰What is a Business Plan?βœ”

A To learn how to love yourself

Accept Your Personality Your life has not ended yet. You still have plenty of years to live. Hence, it's never too late to improve or develop yourself throughout your life. However, it is best if you accept yourself for whom you are. Be happy and celebrate your unique qualities and characteristics. After all, you are a unique individual created from God's own hands. Be Happy With Your Body Size Both men and women are often too conscious about their physical appearance, especially when they see a well-toned and figured person crossing their way. In case of women, some feel that their breasts are just too small, while there are others who feel they have heavy butt. Men, on the other hand, feel inferior to those who are well built or have a great muscular body. For all such gentlemen and ladies, remember that we are not produced from a single factory. Each one of us is different; hence, it is better if you accept, or rather love, your physical appearance. Built Confidence No person is born with natural confidence. It is the upbringing and your surroundings that help you develop poise and self-confidence. Children who are taught to become self independent from an early age have greater level of confidence than those who look up to their parents for every knick and knack. Start revealing a positive attitude and a feeling of self assurance and see how confidence comes natural to you in no time. Find Out Your Good Qualities And Achievements Looking out for some good qualities in yourself? Were you not able to find any? Does that make you hate yourself further? Why? Aren't you a homosapien? Just like every person has some negative attributes, so does he have positive characteristics as well. It is good to criticize your self but then do not be over critical. Accept your flaws and try to come over them. As for your positives, just keep on bettering them and who knows you might be able to love yourself all the more. Stop Regretting On Your Mistakes So, you have committed a mistake? So what? It's just a mistake. No one is going to beat or punish you to death. Making mistakes is natural to any human being. So stop beating or cursing yourself over and over again. Instead, sit down and analyze your mistakes. Take positive lessons from them and find out what different you can do next time to avoid these stupid and silly errors. Forget the past and plan the future. Don't Let Others Dominate You Sad but true, often people treat you like a doormat simply because you allow them to do so. It's your life and no one has the right to control or rule it, except you. So stop being too kind and generous when a friend constantly borrows money from you with no promises of repaying it back. Stand up and dump that guy who calls and looks up to you only for sex and nothing else. Remember, do not let anyone treat you badly because you deserve better than being only used or criticized…..continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰To learn how to love yourselfβœ”

A Dress proper ladies

Two young ladies arrived in a Meeting wearing clothes that were quite revealing their body parts. Here is what the Chairman told them: He took a good look at them and made them sit. Then he said something that, they might never forget in their life. He looked at them straight in the eyes and said; "ladies, everything that God mande valuable in this world is well covered and hardly to see, find or get…..continuing....

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A Ways of get money for your business

The primary sources of funds for small business start-ups are personal funds, friends and relatives, NGOs or private investors, banks, government agencies and programs, and venture capital…..continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰Ways of get money for your businessβœ”

A The powerful prayer

A Priest has just requested that this be shared, kindly reflect on it. Thanks….continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰The powerful prayerβœ”

A Life facts which I have discovered

When I woke up I was pondering about life, I discovered that:….continuing....

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A BUSINESS FINANCIAL MANAGEMENT PLAN

Sound financial management is one of the best ways for your business to remain profitable and solvent. How well you manage the finances of your business is the cornerstone of every successful business venture. Each year thousands of potentially successful businesses fail because of poor financial management. As a business owner, you will need to identify and implement policies that will lead to and ensure that you will meet your financial obligations…..continuing....

πŸ‘continue to read about πŸ‘‰BUSINESS FINANCIAL MANAGEMENT PLANβœ”

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