Updated: 12 May 2018 18:10. By, Melkisedeck Shine.

V.gif Girlz are like….

Boy: Marry me?
Girl: Do you have a house?
Boy: No..
Girl: Do you have a BMW car?
Boy: No..
Girl: How much is your salary?
Boy: No salary.. but..
Girl: No but. You have nothing. How can I marry you? Just leave me, please!!
Boy: I have one villa, 3 property lands, 3 Ferraris, 2Porsches.. Why do I still needto buy BMW?! How can I get salary when actually I am the BOSS?
Girl : wanna get married ?
Boy: NO !
๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Signs Of Aging

SIGNS OF AGING
Written by a confident lady …๐Ÿ˜„

After a meeting, I was coming out of a hotel and I was looking for my car keys. They were not in my pockets. A quick search in the meeting room, it wasn't there too.

Suddenly I realized I must have left them in the car.

My husband has shouted many times for leaving the keys in the ignition.

My theory is the ignition is the best place not to lose them …….
His theory is the car will be stolen if left at the ignition key slot !

Immediately, I rushed to the parking lot and came to a terrifying conclusion …..
His theory was right. The parking lot was empty ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ž๐Ÿ˜ž.

I immediately called the police. I gave them my location, description of the car, place I parked, etc. I equally confessed that I had left my keys in the car, and that the car had been stolen.

Then I made the most difficult call of all, to my husband,
I left my keys in the car …. and it has been stolen."

There was a big silence. I thought the call had been dropped, but then I heard his voice.
"Idiot", he shouted, "I dropped you at the hotel !"

Now it was my time to be silent. Embarrassed, and happy as well, I said, "Well, then pls come and get me."

He shouted again, "I will, as soon as I convince this policeman, that I have not stolen your car." ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜

Don't laugh alone ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

Send to other husbands or wives because ….
So many things go wrong daily, and you can't blame yourself all the times ๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜†

~~ Shared as received
๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif What did the ocean say to the beach?

Nothing, it just waved.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Why did the pony get detention?

Because he was horsing around.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Why couldnโ€™t the turkey eat dessert?

Because he was stuffed.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Why should you never iron a four leaf clover?

You should never press your luck!

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif What type of key is the most important at Thanksgiving dinner?

The outside.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Why did the book join the police force?

He wanted to go undercover.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Whatโ€™s the best way to talk to a T-Rex?

From a distance.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif How do monsters tell their fortunes?

They read their horror-scopes.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Why is it not a good idea to try to trick a snake?

Because you canโ€™t pull his leg.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Where do pencils go for vacation?

Pencil-vania.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Why did the horse chew with his mouth open?

Because he had bad stable manners.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Which flower talks the most?

Tulips, because they have two lips.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif News about the ice-ยญโ€cream man?

Did you hear about the ice-ยญโ€cream man, he was found dead in his ice-ยญโ€cream van, covered in chocolate sauce and hundreds-ยญโ€and-ยญโ€thousands? The police said that he had ?topped? himself.
๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


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