Updated: 11 May 2018 11:30. By, Melkisedeck Shine.

V.gif What has four wheels and flies?

A trash truck.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Which vegetable should you never invite on a boat trip?

A leek.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Signs Of Aging

SIGNS OF AGING
Written by a confident lady …๐Ÿ˜„

After a meeting, I was coming out of a hotel and I was looking for my car keys. They were not in my pockets. A quick search in the meeting room, it wasn't there too.

Suddenly I realized I must have left them in the car.

My husband has shouted many times for leaving the keys in the ignition.

My theory is the ignition is the best place not to lose them …….
His theory is the car will be stolen if left at the ignition key slot !

Immediately, I rushed to the parking lot and came to a terrifying conclusion …..
His theory was right. The parking lot was empty ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ž๐Ÿ˜ž.

I immediately called the police. I gave them my location, description of the car, place I parked, etc. I equally confessed that I had left my keys in the car, and that the car had been stolen.

Then I made the most difficult call of all, to my husband,
I left my keys in the car …. and it has been stolen."

There was a big silence. I thought the call had been dropped, but then I heard his voice.
"Idiot", he shouted, "I dropped you at the hotel !"

Now it was my time to be silent. Embarrassed, and happy as well, I said, "Well, then pls come and get me."

He shouted again, "I will, as soon as I convince this policeman, that I have not stolen your car." ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜

Don't laugh alone ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

Send to other husbands or wives because ….
So many things go wrong daily, and you can't blame yourself all the times ๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜†

~~ Shared as received
๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif What was born to succeed?

A budgie with a blunt beak.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Whatโ€™s a frogโ€™s favorite game?

Hopscotch.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Why did the pony get detention?

Because he was horsing around.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif What lies on the bottom of the ocean and shakes?

A nervous wreck.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Why do Marxists like fruit infusions?

Because all proper tea is theft!

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Whatโ€™s a rabbitโ€™s favorite kind of music?

Hip-hop.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Which bus crossed the ocean?

Columbus.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Why did the girl put lipstick on her head?

Because she wanted to make-up her mind

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Whatโ€™s a batโ€™s favorite pastime?

Hanging out with his friends.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif What do you get if you cross a pine tree with an apple?

A pine-apple.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif News about the ice-ยญโ€cream man?

Did you hear about the ice-ยญโ€cream man, he was found dead in his ice-ยญโ€cream van, covered in chocolate sauce and hundreds-ยญโ€and-ยญโ€thousands? The police said that he had ?topped? himself.
๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Sham-BOO.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


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