Updated: 12 May 2018 05:53. By, Melkisedeck Shine.

V.gif Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Why is 1+1=3 like your left foot?

Itโ€™s not right.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif What has an eye, but cannot see?

A needle (or potato, tornado, hurricane, etc.).

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif What did the monster ask his sweetheart?

Will you be my Valen-slime?

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif What do you give a sick lemon?

Lemon-aid

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif What has four wheels and flies?

A trash truck.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Why couldnโ€™t the ghost see his parents?

Because they were trans-parents.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Why is it not a good idea to try to trick a snake?

Because you canโ€™t pull his leg.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif New Method to propose

Boy: You look Exactly Like my Wife.!
Girl: Ohhh..What's your Wife Name?
Boy: I'm not Married yet
!
๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif What are there a lot of when turkeys play baseball?

Fowl balls.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif What did the students do when their shoelaces got tangled together?

They went on a class trip.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif What is a kittenโ€™s favorite dessert?

Answer: Mice cream.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif What did the farmer give his wife for Valentineโ€™s Day?

Hogs and kisses.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Signs Of Aging

SIGNS OF AGING
Written by a confident lady …๐Ÿ˜„

After a meeting, I was coming out of a hotel and I was looking for my car keys. They were not in my pockets. A quick search in the meeting room, it wasn't there too.

Suddenly I realized I must have left them in the car.

My husband has shouted many times for leaving the keys in the ignition.

My theory is the ignition is the best place not to lose them …….
His theory is the car will be stolen if left at the ignition key slot !

Immediately, I rushed to the parking lot and came to a terrifying conclusion …..
His theory was right. The parking lot was empty ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ž๐Ÿ˜ž.

I immediately called the police. I gave them my location, description of the car, place I parked, etc. I equally confessed that I had left my keys in the car, and that the car had been stolen.

Then I made the most difficult call of all, to my husband,
I left my keys in the car …. and it has been stolen."

There was a big silence. I thought the call had been dropped, but then I heard his voice.
"Idiot", he shouted, "I dropped you at the hotel !"

Now it was my time to be silent. Embarrassed, and happy as well, I said, "Well, then pls come and get me."

He shouted again, "I will, as soon as I convince this policeman, that I have not stolen your car." ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜

Don't laugh alone ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

Send to other husbands or wives because ….
So many things go wrong daily, and you can't blame yourself all the times ๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜†

~~ Shared as received
๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


V.gif Who is wrong here? Story of men and dog

A man walking down the streets sees another man with a very big dog. One man says to the other, "Does your dog bite", the man replies "No my dog doesn't" The man pats the dog and has his hand bitten off, "I thought you said your dog didn't bite" said the injured man. "Thats not my dog", replied the other.
๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


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